Blue Jell-O
by Lauriesf
Summary: A little bit of comfort for Sam and Jack as they have to wait to be together; had originally planned to leave it on an open ending at the end of chapter 3 but some asked for more! ; this last chapter is rated M, the rest is K ; special thanks to KEF for proofreading this chapter; hope you enjoy'll reading it as much as I did writing it! please R and R
1. Chapter 1

Blue Jell-O

1415: Damn!

Sam was sitting at her desk, trying to take apart a small rectangular device they had found on P4X-480 two days before in an ancient, ghost city about 10 miles north of the stargate. They had met nobody on the planet and thus didn't know what to make of it but she basically had established it didn't seem to be dangerous. So, here she had been bending over her work since 0620 when she had entered the base and had not realized it was so late.

She had taken a break though to get a cup of coffee from the coffee maker in the corner of the room and to go to the bathroom but she often forgot all about lunch. Now, she had a crick in her neck, her hands were sore from trying to pry open the thing, whatever it was, and she knew for certain she needed to refuel if she wanted enough energy to fight that darn object and win!

As she was telling herself she would try for ten more minutes and then allow herself to head for the mess, she heard someone walking in the corridor, obviously heading for her would have recognized the sound of these steps in a million: they were Colonel O'Neill's and she knew what was coming next. He was going ask and say: "Are we done with that thing? Can we move on to exploring the next planet? Carter, I'm bored to death here, waiting for you to give us the go-ahead." Instead, he came behind her and bending over her right shoulder, he smirked: "You know that is a remote control for their old TV sets! These people were probably as uninteresting as sea cucumbers! I'm sure we can forget about them and move on. The next planet on our list seems much more fun... Let's, shall we?"

Carter swiveled her chair to face him, making a face: "Hello, Sir. No, Sir, I'm afraid I'm not finished with it yet."

"I don't care. Anyway, I was on a wild-goose chase trying to make you forget about that thingy (he waved at the object on the table with mock disgust). You're like Daniel: whenever something looks like it's hiding something from you, you get hooked so much you even forget to eat...don't you? (he accusingly pointed his finger at her) In fact, I'm here on a crucial mission: to get you to the mess before you faint from lack of food."

"In a minute, Sir."

"Carter...I mean now", he said, raising his voice and putting on an angry look, as if taunting a child who stalls when he knows he has to take his bath.

"Yes, Sir. Go ahead, I'll join you there."

"No, you won't, you stubborn",he replied, lifting her from her chair and pushing her towards the door, "I'm taking you there myself."

He could be so unnerving sometimes!...Well, to tell the truth, most of the times. But she was always touched when he'd come for her, either to take her to the mess or send her home or even just to see what she was doing. And he had a way of walking next to her, bending his head towards her as he made small talk...she simply loved his gait, which had a springy, almost dancing quality, not unlike a kid who's anticipating the fun he's going to have. She had seen that gait in someone else, an actor in a 1980s TV series she used to watch when younger and she had noticed it in him the first time they had met. Now, with all those years working together almost 24- 7, she still loved it when he did that move. It was casual, not stilted as most soldiers walked, especially officers.

"You know, I've seen blue jell-o on display in the mess when I peaked in to see if you were there...", he winked at her. "I asked the cookhand to keep you one."

"That's very nice of you, Sir. I couldn't possibly live without blue jell-o", she teased him, trying to keep a straight face.

"Carter... you are getting very disrespectful with your superior," he bantered. "Don't push me too far... I'm tempted to report you to the General, or the President!"

"Sir, I wouldn't dare, Sir", she mocked him as she was entering the mess.

As usual, most people turned around to watch them come in, a lot to say hi or admire two members from the original team; some, a growing number, to wonder what these two really meant for each other in their private lives. Nobody would have dared accuse them of bending the rules, of course, but it made more and more people wonder how they could manage to live like this: it was obvious a special bond united them and if they were not mistaken, then the Colonel and his second in command must be having a hard time respecting the regs.


	2. Chapter 2

Ok, here we go : I don't know if that's what those who read the first chapter had in mind for the second one. Sorry, I'm very much into shippers and fluff right now.;)

Blue Jell-o : Chapter 2

I lead a double life, she sighed. I'm responsible, dependable, brainy Major Carter who's not even afraid to kick the ass of a few Goaulds and Sam, madly in love with him.

I cannot help stealing a glance at him as we talk the next mission over with the rest of the team. He's cool and unruffled on the surface. God, I wish I could act like him ! I hope nobody knows what I feel.

Well, he does, of course. We discussed it briefly when we had to deal with the Zatarc. But we never talk about it. It would be like crossing the line, saying it aloud.

«Major», said General Hammond, «could you give us your point of view on the artefact you found on P3X-260?»

«Well, Sir», she said, getting up and standing next to the screen. «You see, first Dr Jackson, as he previously explained, thought it was used in some sort of religious ceremony so I let him examine it and turned my attention to other objects; but, then, he came to my lab saying he'd found a hidden mechanism and wanted me to run some tests. To cut it short, it is much more complex than we'd thought at first but it's not dangerous.»

«Could you elaborate, Major? Give us some technical details... What kind of tests did you run, for instance?»

«Sir, I don't think I should: the last time I did, Colonel O'Neill got mad at me for not understanding a single thing I'd said...», she replied sheepishly, briefly glancing at Jack to see him guffawing.

«Now, that's finally sunk in, hasn't it? Carter, after so many years of boring, scientific dialect, you've finally come to your senses and talk my language! Good for you!», he winked at her and she couldn't help the broad smile that spread on her face.

«Let me explain, General», Jackson said, standing as Sam was settling back into her seat, next to Jack. «Good girl», he grinned at her, very briefly brushing her hand she had rested on the conference table with his. Everybody else was looking at Jackson but Daniel had seen it and he coughed to clear his voice before starting his technical explanation.

«Hum, well, Sir, you see...» She looked at him and confusion spread over her face, but he had turned his gaze to General Hammond so she went back to her own thoughts, not listening to what he was saying, his voice lost in the distance. She could feel Colonel O'Neill's warm body next to hers, his thigh less than an inch from her own. She closed her eyes for just a second and saw comforting images flash through her head of the life they could have if only he wasn't her CO: his hand resting on hers as they would talk over coffee in the early morning light, fishing side by side on his deck and exchanging tender looks without being afraid they'd get caught...

«Carter», his voice took her back to reality. «General Hammond has asked you a question... twice!», he smirked, gently bumping his knee against hers. She had to get a grip on herself not to blush: God, he knew which buttons to push!

After the briefing, they headed for the mess hall and the four of them sat at a table over lunch, Sam and Jack facing each other. Daniel was talking incessantly about the artefact. He could really get excited over the strangest things! Jack reflected. A new episode of the Simpsons, yes, definitely yes; a spongy chocolate cake, no doubt; but an artefact! For God's sake! He smiled at him, as Daniel was addressing him («Don't you find that amazing, Jack?!», his voice raising with excitement), a smile that said: «Yes, sure, keep on talking, I'm not listening to a single word you're saying...» Daniel, in disappointment, turned his attention to Teal'c.

Jack realized Sam had not said a single word since they had arrived. She was absent-mindedly pushing her food on her plate with the tip of her fork, her gaze lost in front of her, on Jack's hands.

He grabbed her fork from her hand and as she was lifting her eyes to meet his, startled at his gesture, he wagged his finger at her: «No playing with your food, young lady! I don't want a single crumb left on that plate or you'll have to go without your dessert!», taking the cup of blue jelly off her tray.

He was expecting her to answer back playfully but, instead, he saw she was looking at him wistfully, her wide blue eyes seeming to talk silently to him, saying: «I know I'm not supposed to say it out loud but hear me please; at least, read my eyes and listen to my soul. Do you have any idea what you kindle in me when you tease me like you just did back in the briefing room? It only takes the sound of your voice for my emotions to ignite.» Jack returned her look and she saw in his eyes the same wistfulness.

A couple of hours later, Sam was in her lab. Jack, Daniel and Teal'c had been in with her, looking at different artefacts and she had finally said she needed time alone to test them. As she moved one of them, she found a small piece of paper hiding underneath. She unfolded it. Just a few words were written and it was not signed but she recognized the handwriting for being that of her CO.

«I know what you're going through. I feel the same. No, we cannot talk about it but yes, my feelings have remained the same. Sorry about before, in the conference room: I couldn't help it. I cannot offer much right now but whenever you cannot take it anymore, tell me to meet you in the mess hall for a cup of jelly: I'll get it. And I'll do the same with chocolate cake.»

It might not have meant much to someone else but it did mean the world to her.


	3. Chapter 3

Blue Jell-O - Chapter 3

This whole story is meant to fill in the gaps left in the real story in the series. Hopefully, it is not AU. Please don't hesitate to post if I made mistakes & need to rewrite some parts. I remember reading comments from a producer of the series saying he didn't want to go all the way through the Jack/ Sam relationship but that the fishing scene was kind of meant as a nod to the viewers, saying it was obvious they'd end up together some day. So I thought about comforting images in missing scenes that would be in keeping with the show while they both wait for that time to come.

And then years had gone by. They had settled in a comfortable, drowsy routine of missions, working at the base and seeing each other with the rest of the team from time to time: birthdays, the fourth of July, New Year's Eve..., always at his place, sometimes at his cabin, even when he had been promoted as General and head of the SGC.

On those occasions, it was not "Sir" but "Jack" for everyone. They would spend the day sitting on lawn chairs for the pleasure of being next to each other, quiet moments relaxing, occasionally exchanging thoughts, or on his back porch where he would barbeque and they would trade jokes over beer. In winter, they'd stay inside lounging on the sofas and enjoying a nice fire, drinking hot cocoa and watching sci-fi movies to humor Teal'c or re-runs of the Simpsons to humor him.

There were some exceptional, awkward moments when they would find themselves alone in the kitchen or outside on the porch and they would briefly touch or their eyes would lock for a few seconds. And then Daniel would barge in telling them to come and join them or to get something from the fridge. Then the moment was over but they would relish in it. This was all they had.

On clear nights, when they could see the stars, he would get his telescope outside and they would take turns gazing at places the other earthlings could only imagine but that were known territory to them.

Daniel and Teal'c had long stopped deluding themselves. They knew there was something special between their CO and 2IC. They would make things easier for them, both giving them the occasion to sit together on the couch but not leaving them alone too much because they knew it was excruciating for them to respect the rules. They were hoping one day soon it would become possible for them to be a twosome. Nobody talked about it, only knowing, compassionate looks were exchanged.

Sam would try not to think about it... anything but sitting and turning over those gloomy thoughts in her head when she was on her own. On those few occasions when she sat alone at home, she'd think about that small paper he'd left in her lab. They'd kept true to it and met from time to time at the mess. They often didn't need to call each other: one would know when the other was in want of a cosy moment and dessert.

She had been spending more and more time at the base, sometimes not even going home for weeks on end, drowning herself in work to forget nothing else was waiting for her outside. And he'd copied her behavior, staying when she stayed, filling in reports and dropping by at her lab around lunch and dinner to chat with her, prompting her to come to the gym or have a nice game of chess over a cup of tea.

It was easy and comfortable, a headlong rush into nothingness. Because, of course, it was a non-relationship; they were not friends - couldn't be - and he was still her CO, always her CO.

When she'd been trapped on the Prometheus and was all alone, she'd finally realized she was deluding herself, that this non-relationship and her feelings for the one she could not have were keeping her from exploring other options. And some time later, when she'd met her brother's friend Pete, it had appeared like perfect timing to her. She should have realized that things were not right: it was definitely not right for a guy who barely knew her to stalk her and try to find about her – persistently so. But Pete was not off-limits and he was nice, made her her feel real in the real world, not just a promise of a virtual "always".

Jack had said nothing, of course. He wanted her; couldn't have her; knew she deserved more; that summed it all up. He was hurt but recognized she was right at attempting to move on and had exerted to do the same by pursuing a relationship with agent Johnson. Obviously, he'd lied to himself: it was Carter; it would always be Carter. She knew it too: sh'd broken off with Pete... and they had both been back to being lonely. His showing her his promise still held had been a fishing party at his cabin, as if they were family and they could always count on these special moments.

But when he'd announced his team one day he had been promoted as head of Homeworld Security, she had snapped. She'd always taken for granted that things would remain the same. She was so desperate she didn't mind loving him - adoring him - in silence if he only remained within reach. But now he was going to DC, her world was crumbling down.

She had offered the necessary congratulations, keeping a steady smile pasted on her face and then had lied about being busy, headed for her lab and locked the door before allowing her tears to well up and fall freely down her cheeks. She was ghastly-pale with despair and fear: he had always been around, always been there to watch her six, even when he was no longer on the team. He was leaving her all alone. Promises were just that after all: empty words only leading to nothingness.

She heard soft rapping on her door. She didn't answer and waited for whoever it was to go away. But the knock on the door was renewed, this time with more insistance: "Carter, I know you're in there. Open up! I've gotten jelly for you from the mess. Care to share?"

She had to smile in spite of herself. He knew she was in pain. He'd come. But then she thought about how he'd not cared to share the information with her in private before telling the others, about how hurt she was.

"No, thank you, Sir. I'm not hungry. And I've got urgent work to do."

"Come on, Carter. Humor me, will you? The jelly is blue, your favorite. I'm sure once you start eating you'll see how much you needed it."

"No, thanks, Sir. Plus, I've grown up, you know. Things change. Our tastes too. I don't like jelly that much anymore."

"Don't be such a stubborn idiot! Open the door, Sam and stop calling me Sir: it's Jack, remember; I've not changed. I still know what you need... Sam? Do you hear me, open that door, it's an order!" He was now yelling.

She unlocked the door after brushing the tears off her eyes and cracked the door open. She looked at him straight in the eyes with a tense jaw: "Which one is it, Sir or Jack? Because Jack can't give me orders. But I had gotten the impression it was always Sir, here, on base", she smirked sarcastically.

He growled, white with anger and pushed through the door, grabbing her arm and closing the door behind him: "Damn it, Sam!" He set the cup of jelly on her desk. "I know you're hurt. I can see you've been crying. You might fool others, not me. I may be an ass but I'm not stupid. Don't tell me you've moved on and you don't care about me. Don't tell me it doesn't hurt - us having to part -because I won't believe it for a second. I'm not doing it to hurt you; I'm doing it because I have to. Sometimes, we don't get to choose."

His look had locked with hers and she could feel she was melting under his chocolate brown gaze. "Sam, this promotion is not a way of stalling. I'm a man of my words." He took one step towards her and before she could protest, he was gently setting his right hand on the small of her back while his left was reaching for the nape of her neck and pulling her to him. She could feel her whole body shivering under his touch. He slowly lowered his head and left a gentle kiss on her trembling lips.

She couldn't let him do that; he knew he was taking advantage of the situation: she was vulnerable and so wanted him to hold her like this... She freed herself from his embrace while she still could muster enough willpower.

"Sir, I think you should go. It is not appropriate behavior and we could both damage our careers if someone saw us. On top of that, we both know it is a goodbye kiss and there's no good goodbye, Sir," her heart telling her to shut up and instead ask for more.

"Sam, one: it is Jack; two: I'm the one in charge here so I get to say what is appropriate; and three: it's not a goodbye: it's just temporary. I'll soon retire. I'm an old man. My knees are busted. And as I've told the President, I've done a lot for this program. I'm entitled to retire. He agrees. But you don't say no to the President, especially in times like these. There's a lot to be done and I'll make sure no dumb politician gets in the way of what we have worked so hard to create. And I want you to take time to think about all this. (On that, she snorted, tears tugging at her eyes: "eight years, Jack. I've had plenty of time to think. And about the "old man", let me tell you something: I've been fighting jealous bouts for years as I had to try and ignore the gawking looks of the young female officers and their sassy remarks about you being hot and all that..." She rolled her eyes, making him laugh.) And, I want you to have the career you deserve, not settle in married life and leave the Army to be with me. I'm still in your line of command: they won't let us be. You know that, don't you?"

"Yes, I do, Sir" He winced at the respectful form of address. "I want to apologize for making you think you needed to come and talk to me. I've been selfish. I'd thought once you'd stayed some time at the SGC as our commanding officer, you'd retire. Obviously, you need to move on to some better position. You deserve it, Sir."

He sighed: "Sam, I'm sorry..." He took a step towards her, took hold of her left hand and dropped a light kiss on it. "I won't bother you any longer. You won't even have to see me again if you don't wish to. My replacement will arrive tomorrow. I'll be gone within 48 hours. If you want to talk to me, feel free to drop by at my place...anytime. Bye, Sam."

She watched him leave the room and didn't find the strength to say goodbye to him.

He kept true to his words and she did not see him again. Teal'c and Daniel could see she hurt badly and that Jack did too but all they could do was give them space.

The day after he'd left for DC, Daniel dropped by at her place after work.

Sadly, there was nothing waiting for her on base so she had left work early to avoid being in places where he'd been. The whole base was haunted by his presence, even her now, she couldn't stand it.

She opened and closed the fridge and cabinets in her kitchen: there was barely anything edible in there and anyway, she was not hungry. When Daniel rang the doorbell, she thought: "Oh, God! Please! I'm not ready to discuss this." She opened the door and said: "Look, Daniel, whatever it is you want to talk about..." He interrupted her, lifting his hand to shush her: "I'm not here to bother you. A certain general has entrusted me with giving you this", handing her a small package and a letter. "And this is from me: I thought you might need to refuel, even if you don't feel like it", giving her a bag filled with grocery. "You'll find the four food groups in there: chips, chocolate bars, ice cream and a couple of wine coolers! ", he winked at her.

She hugged him, moved by his thoughtfulness. "Thanks, Daniel, see you at work tomorrow."

"Take care, Sam."

She went back inside, laid the grocery bag and letter on the island top in the kitchen and opened the package: it was a pack of blue Jell-O... What the hell was he thinking? Goodbye kiss and now, this, to remind her about everything she'd be missing ?!, she thought, her anger flaring. She grabbed the letter, telling herself she wouldn't even bother to read it and was in the process of throwing them in the bin when the small pack of jelly opened and something dropped to the floor with a tinkling sound.

She bent and retrieved the most precious ring she'd ever seen. It was a small band of pink California gold with a tiny diamond sitting in the middle and two small roses made of the same gold on each side. It looked old-fashioned, like the pretty little things you could see at some nice antique shops, not like those brand new flashy rings you could buy at jewellery stores in shopping malls.

In a daze, still clasping the ring in her hand, she went to sit on the sofa and opened the letter:

"Sam," it said, "I'm sorry you're still mad at me. I didn't want us to part that way. I had hoped it would go smoothly but of course, it could not, not after what we've been through, not after me acting like a coward, not telling you before the others. Of course, you're mad at me: you're entitled to it. And I'm an ass. I hope you'll find a way to forgive me.

See, I'd hoped with time you would regard me as a friend, that you'd not have such strong feelings for me anymore and you'd find someone good for you, someone who'd allow you to have both your career and a private life and I'd be the one left to hurt. You're young and beautiful and smart and I'm just not that. I've always felt I was not good enough for you, that I didn't deserve you.

But I see your feelings have not abated so I want you to know that I belong with you, that is, if you still want me...

The ring is my grandmother's. My grandpa didn't have much money so he couldn't buy expensive stuff. But it is family heirloom. Even when they were much older and he wanted to buy another one for her, she refused. She said this one suited her fine because it was a token of his love and commitment. I want you to have it and hope you'll feel the same about it. You're part of me, Sam, and this ring is a part of me staying with you as I'm leaving for DC.

I'll soon be back, hopefully, and promise to follow you like your shadow everywhere you'll be assigned. I'll work as a civilian for you if need be or stay at the cabin waiting for you to join me for a fishing vacation at this amazing pond that never seems to have fish! And you can be certain, there'll always be a huge bowl of jelly waiting for you in my fridge.

Love you,

Always,

Jack"

She couldn't see through her tears. They'd started flowing the instant she'd read the first words. She'd been cold and unfair to him and he had left. But he knew she loved him and she'd wait for him to come home to her.

She took the ring and looked at it more carefully this time. Jakc's grandmother had been right: it was perfect. She wouldn't want any other engagement ring. But she was not going to wear it now: it was his prerogative to slide it on her finger when he'd come back. She went to her bedroom and found a gold chain in her jewellery box and got the ring on it, then clasped it around her neck. It would stay there from now on; she would cherish it. She'd not need jelly after all: this was much better!


	4. Chapter 4

Blue Jell-O : Chapter 4

Ok, guys, this is it ! You asked for it... though this may not be exactly what you expected ! I enjoyed myself a lot...at your expense... Have fun !

Don't worry, more is coming;)

This chapter was written to please LadyMo and Loufiction who had requested an end to this story, though I'd first meant to leave it with an open ending. Special thanks to LadyMo for all her suggestions and constructive criticism;)

It'd been several days now since he'd last seen her. He'd left but until the last moment he'd hoped she'd change her mind. He didn't really know what he expected, really..., couldn't blame her either, right ? He'd beaten around the bush for as long as he could remember to be honest, since they'd known each other. Each time he'd told himself he'd missed a chance to do something about all this what, he didn't know because, of course, they were stuck in this situation.

But he kept on blaming himself for a lot of things, everything in fact : not telling her in the first place then pretending nothing was happening between them when it was obvious she plainly worshipped him and all she wanted was for him to send a sign to her that this was it, that he wanted her no matter what obstacles they'd have to overcome letting her think she could get away with it by marrying this damn Shanahan, when what he really wanted was beat the hell out of this guy, not because he was a dork, but just because he had set his eyes on her...

God, he had to stop thinking about all this there and then or he'd get mad. A huge headache was building at the back of his head and threatening – again – to engulf his whole brain : since he'd left the base for DC, his migraines had kept coming and going, only eased by the painkillers he'd taken regularly to avoid being remembered as the General who'd gone on sick leave the first day he'd settled in his new position.

When he'd left the base, Daniel and Teal'c had taken him to the airport and he'd told them he'd call as soon as he'd have his office line ready, which he had, hoping that this was the reason why she had not called him yet. 'Course she had his cell phone number but maybe she thought she shouldn't reach him that way... Come on, Jack, you're deluding yourself, he gushed. How stupid can you become ? She's not called you because she doesn't want to talk to you.

He'd had Daniel on the phone and had incidently asked about Sam. Jackson had stated he'd dropped the package at her place and then had left not knowing how she'd reacted to the letter. Daniel had surmised it was not any ordinary goodbye gift and letter Jack had asked him to deliver personally, but Jack had been very privy about it and Daniel, for once, had decided it was in everybody's best interest not to intrude. That was something... Daniel not being his usual nosy self ! Jack could have chuckled at the thought if he had not been so preoccupied.

Daniel had even been very evasive about Sam's behavior these last few days : he'd only said when asked about her « health » that she was doing good, as usual, had a lot of work and even seemed to be fairly happy.

Jack had cringed at the thoughts of Sam looking happy : that was it she had finally gotten rid of him for good far from the eyes, far from the heart... She could finally move on... What did he think ? That she would be moved to tears by his gift and letter, would grab the phone and tell him that she loved him too, that she would wait for him to come back and slide that ring around her finger...

He'd made a fool of himself. He should have taken the risk of endangering their careers a long time ago, when he'd still had the chance to do so instead of waiting for her to get tired of him. Some years ago, things would have been different but he was an old man now, his greying hair looked almost white and he could see the lines on his face boring creases into his skin making him look exactly his age, and even more. He was definitely not in shape to sweep her off her feet, especially not her who was so much younger than him.

He'd been sure of himself when he'd written the letter but now, away from her and her sky blue eyes which had made him so confident for so many years, he felt he had been wrong about asking her to marry him : he was too old for her damn, he could almost be her dad, for crying out loud !

He'd really screwed the whole goddamn situation : if he had kept his big mouth shut, they could have remained « friends », so to speak, and he could have gone on seeing her from time to time, loving her at a distance. But of course, he'd never learnt to keep his mouth shut it had gotten him in a lot of trouble over the years as a soldier and in his private life. Damn, Jack, you're an ass !

While Jack was flaying himself for all the things he thought he'd done wrong, unaware of what was going on miles away from him, Sam was humming in her lab. She'd come to work that morning with a bright smile on her face that would have earned her a « morning sunshine » and a grin from her General had he still been there. But that morning she didn't mind. She had put a lot of thinking into all that, wondering what was the most appropriate way of reacting to the present situation. She was a logical person who always pondered her decisions knowing rushing into something was not the wise thing to do.

Sure she'd been enthralled when she'd received his letter but she wanted to take time to think about what she should do best. So when Daniel had implied he'd talked to Jack, that Jack had given him his office phone number and had asked about the « team », she'd not asked him about how he was doing and had not insisted on getting the phone number.

Daniel had been blabbering about Jack telling him he had a huge house in one of the nicest districts in town but he'd had the impression she was not listening as she was finishing her lunch.

What he had noticed was that, for once, she'd not gotten herself jell-o but a nice piece of chocolate cake when asked about it, she'd bantered that finally she could lay her hands on cake, now the General was not there anymore to eat all the pieces. Daniel had blinked but refrained from saying this was kind of a cruel retort and Teal'c had only raised an eyebrow which had been quite eloquent.

She needed time to plan her next moves. She didn't want to screw things like she'd done it with Pete. She'd been so mean with him, the way she'd let him go. Men like him or O'Neill deserved to be treated better. So while everybody on base was wondering how she could stand being there with him gone to DC, Sam was going through her routine of work, research, reports, interrupted only when she needed to get a cup of coffee or make a few phone calls, some of which were not precisely meant for her job. After all, she had a life beside work and she intended to live her life to the full now Jack was in DC. So she'd planned carefully for her weekend, starting in the morning with packing a few clothes and toiletries for the two days ahead.

Having decided what she exactly wanted to do and how she wanted to do it, and having made the arrangements, she felt lighter : what was done was done. She had a plan and needed to carry it out. Then she would feel relieved.

Then, Daniel unexpectedly barged in, pushing the door open, not even giving her time to react : « Say, Sam I've got something on my mind and really need to get it out before it really drives me crazy. » Sam looked up at him from her desk, taken aback by his sudden alertness. She had thought he would have had the decency to leave her alone for a little longer, at least, she'd hoped, until things were settled as she wanted them and she could shut him up for good.

« Well, Daniel, nobody has ever succeeded in making you shut up when you wanted to say something, so go ahead : spit it out... »

Daniel made a face : « Thank you very much for being so supportive, especially as I'm doing this for you ! », he added, his pride obviously wounded. « Sam, what the hell is going on ? You haven't asked once about Jack you don't listen to me when I talk about him you haven't even called him since he left for DC... I know because I... well, I checked with him », he added sheepishly, seeing her scolding look. « I'm worried about you two... »

« Well, Daniel, we might be friends but it's no reason for you bothering me with things that are none of your business ! », she replied indignantly.

« None of my business ?! Well, that takes the cake ! Really ! I mean, we've had to watch you swooning over him all those years, getting sick at heart for not being allowed to be with him and now he's just been gone a few days, you act like he's never existed ! I even heard you humming just before entering your lab ! », he added with an accusing look, « Really, Sam, what's come over you ? »

« As I've just told you », she said, pushing him towards the exit, « mind your own business », and closing the door behind him. Then a crooked smile dawned on her face. It was almost time to leave work and she couldn't help thinking about the great weekend she was ready to treat herself to.

Back in DC, Jack had finally left work early, as he was not really in the mood for organizing himself for his new job. He'd barely grunted to the people he'd met, being true to his reputation of the guy you shouldn't piss off or else... His migraine had not improved and he'd decided the best way to get rid of it was to go « home » to his fancy new house, courtesy of his new job, and go to bed early.

He shrugged off his uniform, took a hot shower, changed into his blue pajamas and settled in bed with the tv on and a bowl of blue jell-o for his dinner : how pathetic was that ! It was the only thing he had in his kitchen, apart from a few beers in the fridge, frozen pizza in the freezer and fruit of the loop cereals in one of the kitchen cabinets. He didn't even feel like having one of those yummy chocolate sponge cakes he'd seen in the window of the bakery around the corner. Jell-O ! That was all he had left from her...

He finished the bowl looking gloomily at a rerun of the Simpsons on tv : even Homer couldn't lighten his mood. He was utterly depressed, feeling like a fifteen-year-old as he caught himself checking his cell phone for texts or missed calls every ten minutes. Pathetic was exactly the term that now defined him best ! Not handsome, or rakish or even sarcastic, no, only pathetic...

He sighed, switched off the tv and lights, after taking another aspirin, and then tossed and turned until he got tired enough and finally drifted off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Blue Jell-O : chapter 5

Yes, I know, kind of a shock to think Sam might act like a jerk with Jack, right ?! Remember, previously, in our story, Jack thought he had made a fool of himself and Sam seemed to be hiding a lot from us all, except me, of course... Here's the end hope it's not too sugary and sweet.

In DC, Jack had drifted off to sleep and was now having nightmares about Sam, gorgeous in a beautiful white gown, standing him up as he was waiting for her in church in front of a whole gathering of friends, family and co-workers. Then, his nightmare shifted to a new vision of her, holding the hand of a two-year-old kid who looked exactly like Pete... This was what had most troubled him recently : that she'd go back to him or find someone younger and start the family she would not want with him because, let's face it, she probably thought he was too old to be a dad now.

He suddenly woke up, beads of sweat covering his forehead. His headache had faded but his mouth was parched and he felt dizzy from the visual images he'd just had. He got up and went to the bathroom to splash cool water on his face and drink from the faucet. He glanced at the clock on the bedside table and saw he had only slept for a few hours : it was 2:15 a.m. and pitch-dark outside. He really needed to get some sleep !

As he was getting back into bed, he had the impression he'd heard a soft rap on the front door but then decided that was obviously his imagination playing a trick on him because who would be stupid enough to disturb him in the middle of the night ? As if people didn't know how dangerous it could get to wake up Jack O'Neill !

Then he heard it again... He had not been dreaming : someone was knocking on his door, this time with more energy. Then it dawned on him ! It had to be this idiot that had been assigned to help him at the office : Sergeant Whatever Was His Name... He'd only known him for a couple of days but the kid already got on his nerves, always trying to find what he could do for him, coming to his office every few minutes to have him sign papers... He'd even had the cheek to come to the house the morning before because there were papers « of the utmost importance that couldn't wait ». He'd bawled him out telling him to « go hiking », that he'd better understand now, before it was too late, what « privacy » meant... Obviously, the kid had not gotten the message !

Well, he was certainly not going to spare him ! Then , he heard his cell phone vibrating under his pillow. God, how on earth had he gotten his private cell phone number ? That took the cake : white with anger, he grabbed his gun from the drawer of his bedside table, planning on scaring the hell out of him, teaching him a lesson he would never forget. He got downstairs, unlocked the door and flung it open, pointing his gun at the object of his anger...only to find Sam, looking at him in alarm, her big blue eyes wide with wonder and even fear.

« Jack... Sir... what are you doing ? », she uttered, dumbfounded.

« Sam, eh », was all he said at first, at a loss for words. Then he regained his composure and added, anger still flaring in his voice : « What the hell are you doing on my doorstep at two in the morning ? »

« Well, Jack », she retorted sarcastically, wincing at the tone of his voice. « Now, I'm kind of asking myself the same question... »

« Come on, this is not what I meant », he replied, forcing his voice into a softer intonation. « You know what I meant, right ? », he said, waving the gun he still had in his hand.

« No, I don't, Sir. » That hurt ! Now, she was backtracking, resuming her « I'm your subordinate » attitude. « What is it with you ? You pointed a gun at me ! »

He suddenly looked sheepish, realizing how stupid he might look talking to her still holding the gun... He set it down on the table, next to his keys and then put on an engaging smile as he asked her to come in.

« Really, Sir, I'm not sure it's such a good idea. You don't seem yourself right now. I should come back in the morning. »

« Carter, get inside, damn it ! You obviously came all this way because you had something to say to me, is that right ? » He bent his head a little to peer into her eyes, waiting for an answer.

She nodded and sighed, then she crossed the threshold, putting her bag on the floor. He locked the door and turned to face her : « I'm glad you're here, Sam », he whispered, taking a step towards her, wistfulness in his eyes. Her heart skipped a beat but she took a step back, holding up her hand to stop him : « I'm not sure this was the right moment to do this I should probably have waited to come and talk to you you seem to have issues here you need to settle first... », thinking all the while how hard this was going to be if he was in that mood.

« I don't have « issues », Sam », he told her, his temper flaring again. « And it's always the right time for you to come and see me you'll always be welcomed here... », he said wondering why she seemed so cold while all he wanted was to take her in his arms. The fear he'd felt just moments before, when he'd been dreaming, about losing her was slowly but very effectively creeping back into his heart and his shoulders sagged a little.

He suddenly realized that she looked very tired and that it was not a proper time for a conversation in the entrance hall : « Sam, did you sleep on the plane ? Had something to eat ? », he worried.

« Just a little sleep the guy next to me was as nosy and talkative as Daniel... », she winced, in mock disgust, making him laugh quietly. « And I couldn't eat... », she added, lowering her eyes and shuffling her feet.

He cupped her chin in his hand and lifted her head so he could look into her eyes : « Why is that, Colonel ? Something's on your mind ? »

She nodded bashfully, butterflies fluttering in her stomach : that was much harder than she'd anticipated.

He took pity on her, not wanting to push it too far right now : she apparently needed time and confidence to talk to him. He gestured for her to follow him, not wanting to scare her by taking her hand when she looked so shy and distant. He led her to the kitchen and asked what she wanted, blue jell-o or cereals ? « Cereals will be fine, Sir. I'm not in the mood for eating jell-o right now. » He felt like someone had suddenly punched him in the stomach : that was a sign, wasn't it ? Bad omen.

He did not say a word and went on preparing her bowl of cereals and some coffee from the expresso machine, then put everything on a tray and took it to the coffee table in the living-room.

« You have a nice house, Sir », she remarked.

« Yeah, you think so ? I think it's ok but, you know, I've never been into fancy, expensive stuff so I can't wait to get back to my cabin. »

She sat next to him on the sofa and took a seep from the scalding coffee : « This feels good : It's freezing outside tonight and I was already cold from the air conditioning on the plane... », she whispered, as if only talking for her own benefit.

« I'm sorry it's my fault, leaving you outside for so long », he apologized, rubbing her back to warm her. « Here », he said, wrapping her in a blanket that he'd left on the arm of the couch.

« Will you tell me why you did not open when I knocked and then texted you ? »

« Well, first of all, it was the middle of the night... », he said, raising an eyebrow the way Teal'c would have done it, making her chuckle. « Then I thought it was that busybody I've been allotted for the office, coming to bother me – yet again... It had nothing to do with you. » He was thoughtful for a couple of seconds then added : « Why didn't you call me from the airport ? You know I would have gladly come to pick you up, don't you ? »

« I was not sure I deserved it, Jack. », she said, looking at him with tears in her eyes.

« Here we go », he thought, his heart breaking at the thought of what she was going to say. « Sam, I know », he rubbed her arm, trying to give her the courage to say what she must. She looked surprised : « Really, Jack ? I didn't know if I was right to come and tell you so soon. » He interrupted her : « Hon', let me finish. I know this is hard, but we both knew it was coming, right ? » She nodded, tears falling freely from her eyes now. She'd told herself she would be strong and say the things the way she'd rehearsed them at home and on the plane. But now he was being so gentle with her, she felt herself faltering. Jack gave her a sad smile, took a deep breath and said, looking at his hands sitting on his lap : « I know you've come to tell me you couldn't accept my proposal. I understand. I feel like a douche imposing that on you. I know all your reasons : I've had time to think since I arrived. I'm too old you need some younger who doesn't have my troubled past... » He looked up at her. She was dumbfounded. Then the expression on her face shifted to a mixture of outrage and mirth.

« Jack, you're really something, you know that ? You're not a douche but you certainly are an ass. I haven't come here to say goodbye to you, you dork. I'm here to tell you that there is no way I'm going to wait for the President to grant you permission to marry me. I'll petition the White House if need be. You're rightfully mine, do you hear me ? I haven't waited all those years for the man I love to be told yet again that I have to wait. I certainly won't change my mind. How can I tell you that I love you so you finally believe me, Jack ? », she said cupping his face with her hands and gently tracing the dark circles he had under his eyes with her thumbs : « You could use some sleep, Jack. »

« I know. Sleep hasn't really been my priority these last few days. I was worried about you... You seem like you haven't slept that much either... », waving immediately in disclaim, as a sad look spread on his face : « I'm not saying you're not beautiful, or anything, you know... », his voice trailed off in embarassment.

She laughed quietly : « Jack, stop apologizing. I know what you mean. Yes, I spent more time thinking than sleeping since you left. I should have called you, or texted you... I don't know, to reassure you, but it seemed so mundane and your letter was so cute, a text would clearly not have been appropriate. In fact, I'm the one who should apologize here. I should never have pouted in the first place. It was stupid and childish. Of course, you had no choice and of course, you were doing the right thing... And, you're not a coward you're the most selfless person I've ever met. You always put my needs and my interests and my career first. You've always made the right decisions.

He tried to interrupt but she shushed him, laying a finger on his lips, then a soft and gentle kiss. « Let me finish, will you ? I'm not done telling you how I feel, because, obviously, you need a little pep talk here. I know you've had misgivings about being older than I am. You shouldn't. You're the right one for me, Jack and I won't let you continue being so harsh on yourself : where you see an old guy, I see a handsome man most men half your age couldn't compete with where you see grey, I see silver hair and you must know just how becoming it looks on you and how that really turns me on...every single time I look at you. » She beamed at him, seeing the look of amazement on his face as he realized that was the first time she'd used that expression in front of him. Well, amazement and something more...

She decided it was high time she took the matter into her own hands : she dropped the blanket and in one swift move, sat on his lap, straddling him, her knees on each side of his hips, her eyes and mouth only an inch from him and her hands around his neck.

« Wow, Sam, what the hell... ? », he protested.

« This is all you have to say ? », she replied mischieviously. « I thought you wanted to say something earlier », all the while pecking kisses all over his face.

« Well, I don't remember what I wanted to say : I can't concentrate with you doing this to me... » She giggled. « Oh, Carter, don't giggle either, ok ? It's really not safe to do that to me : that turns me on. And you sitting right here and kissing me and all that, », he gasped as she started kissing his earlobe then his neck and carressing his forearms, her hands moving up to his shoulders, « that is very dangerous for you, young lady, especially with me only wearing pajamas. Bad things could happen to you... », he added, trying to slow her down.

« Well, let bad things happen to me, Sir », a crooked smile on her face, « I'll take the blame. I'll put that in my petition to the President : I'll tell him how valiantly you have fought and what a naughty girl I have been », she whispered mischieviously in his ear.

« Sam », he moaned, this is not wise at all... » his voice low and husky.

« Jack, please... », she begged, staring at him with her big blue eyes.

« Please, what ? », he said, trying to stall, his voice filled with repressed desire.

« Please, Sir », she replied, smiling impishly.

« Why do you keep calling me Sir, Carter ? Do you have any idea how much this arouses me ? »

« As a matter of fact, I do...Sir »

She could see he was trying to find a way out of this – for her own sake, she knew – but could also see the longing in his eyes that were getting darker every second.

« Jack, you're a very stubborn man who's ill-treated himself for too long. You need me to show you how much I adore you... », her whole body now pressed against his, her fingers buried in his hair, her mouth on his and her tongue tracing the outline of his lips. She closed her eyes and forced her tongue through his, sending shivers down his spine.

« Are you sure you want to do that, Sam », he whispered, his voice hoarse from lust.

« Never been so sure of myself in my whole life. »

« Sam, wake up, sleepy head », she heard his beloved voice through the fog of her slumber. She raised her head a little and saw him sitting next to her on the bed, holding a phone in his hand. A smile spread on her face at the sight of his tousled hair, immediately followed by a deep blush at the memory of all the things that had happened that night.

Morning sunshine was pouring through the window and she saw that it must be already late.

« It's eight, Hon' », he smiled at her, brushing a light kiss on her forehead. « Sorry to wake you up but I've got a very worried archeologist on the phone who says he's repeatedly tried to reach you since you left work last night – apparently to apologize for something mean he'd said to you – and as you did not answer either phone, he's just dropped by at your place to find the car gone and the house locked. He's asking if, by chance, I might have received a call from you... What shall I tell him ? », he concluded, raising an eyebrow.

She cuddled against him : « You know, you might as well tell him the truth. Well, not the part about you doing this thing to my earlobe and me not reacting in a very professional way », she blushed. « Only the general idea... », she sighed with contentment. « That will shut it up for good ! »

Jack lifted the phone to his ear : « Ok, Danny Boy, I have permission from Colonel Carter to inform you that she is right here by my side, in my bedroom, in fact, hum, in my bed, to tell you the truth... », a grin spreading on his face. « Yep, Daniel... Nope, I won't tell you more. From here on, you're on your own kid : unleash your imagination ! », he said, hanging up on him.

« You realize there's no turning back, now, do you ? », he added turning his attention to her.

« I know, Jack. I'll notify General Landry as soon as I get back to work on Monday morning. »

« And, I'll need to send a memo to the President, telling him things have advanced much faster than we'd anticipated », he winced at the thought of it. « He might not like it. »

« Well, he'll have to do with it. »

« Yeah, now you've made sure I couldn't go beating around the bush any longer, right, you feisty little thing ! ». He poked at her side, a look of mock indignation on his face.

« Exactly, Jack. You know what they say : a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do. »

« Wasn't it meant for men ? »

« Sure, but since you men now think you can always stall a little longer, we women have to wear the pants ! », she bantered. « Soon enough, we'll be the ones making the proposals and you'll be the ones staying at home to take care of the babies », she added, sticking her tongue at him.

She had expected he would answer something witty but instead, he sat, gazing at her.

« Speaking of which, Sam », he said in a voice suddenly filled with emotion and lifting the ring she'd been wearing around her neck : « What did you decide ? Am I allowed to see it on your finger or do you wish to wait a little longer ? », he asked tentatively.

« Jack, do we really have to do this all over again ? When will you understand I've been yours for the taking for the last eight years ? Or is it a very wicked way of getting more cuddling ? », she teased him, giggling on seeing his sheepish look.

Jack unfastened the chain from her neck and took the ring. « I had always imagined doing that properly, you know, like in the movies, one knee down and all that... »

« Jack, this is the right moment. I don't care about where and how. I only care about you. We've had enough romance and hurt for the last eight years to have our lives adapted to the screen. Plus, if you do it now, we'll have a lot of fun telling our family and friends we can't possibly recount them how you proposed ! » They looked into each other's eyes, picturing the scene, their complicity as strong as ever.

He took hold of her hand and very gently slid the ring around her finger, then, tightly wrapping his arms around her waist, he tumbled with her on the bed : « Carter, I hope you're not in a hurry to have breakfast because I want to seal the deal before you change your mind », he whispered in her ear. « Absolutely, Sir : breakfast can wait. And don't you dare think I'll change my mind, Jack : a deal is a deal you're stuck with me now... forever », she whispered back, her breath quickening as she wantonly helped him get rid of his clothes.

On Sunday night, they went to bed early, knowing they'd have to wake up way before dawn so she could catch an early flight and be on time for work. They'd had a quiet dinner at a nice little Italian restaurant two blocks away from his place and then had walked slowly home, holding each other's waist, stopping every few minutes to kiss, not caring a bit about the passers-by gawking at this perfect couple.

Then he'd made love to her once more, very slowly this time, knowing she would carry home with her the feeling of being absolutely adored, worshipped by him.

They drifted off to sleep, their arms tenderly wrapped around each other, his chin on the top of her head and her last thought before closing her eyes was one of utter contentment : they'd agreed they would see each other every weekend and leave they could have, starting next Friday when he would come and get her at the airport after work.

She fell asleep with a smile on her face, as he had a couple of minutes before her, because, really, who wouldn't be totally, utterly satisfied in her place...

Wouldn't you ?;)


End file.
